Hopelessness
by ZAPBETH
Summary: Companion piece to Joan of Arc. Jasper and Bella dance at the wedding.


**A/N: This is a companion piece of sorts to my other story, Joan of Arc. It is not necessary to read that one first, but it is recommended as I do reference it a little bit. This is an one-shot. It will not be updated, and the possibility of this being edited is slim.**

**Of course, any review, even a flame, is welcome.**

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_And if I always seem distracted_

_Like my minds somewhere else_

_That's because it's true, yes it's true_

_it's this stupid pride that makes me feel_

_Like I have to follow through_

_Even half-assedly, loving you_

_Why must I always speak in terms of cowardice?_

_When I guess I should have just come out and told you right from the start_

_-_Break Your Heart by Barenaked Ladies

I still remember the day he made me blush scarlet and stammer out responses that were half-thought through. I still vividly remember the day when he smirked--those full lips rising up a notch--and called me darlin' with a twang carried over into his vampire life.

That day was over a year ago--before Edward left and returned, before he convinced me of the necessity of marriage, before I got a ridiculous armored car as a pre-wedding present. Before everything got so overwhelming that sometimes I thought every circumstance was crushing me. Before I saw another side of Jasper with his teeth bared and his eyes dark with desire. Before Jasper was herded away every time that I ventured into that house in the middle of the forest, that house that I think of as my second home.

I had been dancing all night, and I was sure my feet were going to stage an insurrection after the reception was over. My hair was still contained in the restricting bobby pins and braids. Edward had twirled me around the dance floor with all the ease that he had obtained during his many years living as a vampire. My first dance as a married woman had been amazing--like I was in the middle of an elaborate dream and I was going to wake up any second. My second with Charlie, stiff, easily flustered Charlie, was heart-trenching. He was the reminder of what I was leaving behind for the man dancing with my new mother-in-law, for a life of love, of struggle.

I was passed off to each attendant of the wedding, an endless stream of spinning and different hands at the small of my back. The Cullens' grace was scattered throughout the evening, their cold touch pressing against the thin fabric of my wedding dress. Emmett was one of the first to offer me his hand after he had danced with Rosalie, and Carlisle was not far behind him. The people started to blur together, but before Ben had the chance to approach me for a dance, I felt the one cool hand that I had not ever touched before.

"Bella, I would be honored if I could have this dance."

I breathed in and turned. He looked dashing in his tux, and there was a soft smile on his face, not quite the smirk he had donned on that day a year ago. I nodded, and he took my hand in his and put his other on my back with the gentlest of touches, which I was not half sure that I actually felt it if not for the cold seeping in to cool my flushing skin. His eyes were a golden color, which I was relieved about, even though I had no doubts that he would not attack me.

"Thanks for being the errand boy. I know it probably wasn't the easiest job for you."

He nodded, and there was a moment between the two of us where words were not needed, where words were a hindrance to just being. My eyes were drawn to him like he was a magnet--maybe it was his beauty, like all the other vampires, which is so mesmerizing and so hard to look away. He was looking at me with something new in his eyes, a kind of appreciation that I had never seen before.

"You are beautiful today. And I am doing better with temptation."

My cheeks burned. My whole face was on fire yet again; every compliment from Jasper felt as if it were a spark that set my kindling cheeks aflame. I grimaced at my reaction, a flaw that I would have no trouble leaving behind when the change occurred. I heard a low chuckle, and when I glanced up, his smile was wider than before, more sincere than the smirk had been and more heartfelt than the smile when we started dancing. He was beautiful, awe-inspiring, so amazing that looking into his eyes was like going into a trance.

"I have been wondering. Emmett can handle giving you a hug. I wonder..."

He removed his hands from mine and my back and stepped away from me. I knew that I looked puzzled, my eyebrows drawn toward to form wrinkles. Jasper reached down and grabbed my hand. His finger deftly turned it over to look at my palm and the lines that decorated it. The cold that was distinctly his soothed my embarrassment. He bent at the waist, and I felt a dose of instinctual fear batter my heart. His cold, cold lips touched the heel of my palm--his lips were so cold and unyielding like an indestructible force--he placed a kiss on the heel of my palm.

His lips did not feel unlike Edward's. They both had the same premier characteristic of being like ice. Their kisses had the same texture, the same gentleness behind them.

That instinctual fear changed as though this one experience was what I imagined the venom invading my body would feel like. Instead of my usual blushing, stammering, and attempting anything to rid myself of the situation, a fluttering in my stomach emerged triumphant, like the feeling I had when panicking upstairs earlier today. The butterflies flew through his lips, through my hands, into my intestines. It was not uncomfortable, just different.

"Congratulations, Bella."

He removed his lips from my hand and straightened as he said that. Those butterflies lingered as he closed my fingers over the site and smiled at me, his eyes still golden. He murmured his goodbye as he noticed that the dance was over, and the brief interlude was over when he walked away and Edward took his place.


End file.
